'Tis the Season

Contrary to what last week’s post may have led you to believe, I am enjoying my time here in China. It is different, and there are things that I have not adapted to yet, but there is still much time for me to learn. Although it is sometimes difficult to adjust to the… lonesome factor, I constantly find myself talking to people. I don’t think that the problem is the lack of people to talk to (at least for me), but the lack of a stable group of people to talk to. People I can relate to. I am constantly making fleeting connections on a daily basis, but very few of the people to whom I give my contact info to will ever actually bother to get in touch with me. It’s not that bad, though, as I do have a few fairly stable friends; I just wish they didn’t live so damn far.

This, I just realized, is my first post of the year. I suppose that this post should set the tone for the rest of the posts this year, but it wont. The coming posts may or may not be of this nature, but who knows. I’ve been toying with the idea of writing these posts in a fashion more befitting of a publication, but that would take away my ability to say what I want, when I want. The more I think about it, the less appealing it sounds, as I am sure that it would lead to a faster death for this blog.

Lets get into a couple resolutions. I suppose one of my new year’s resolutions is to continue this blog in its current format, although I hope to do a slight redesign soon. I hope to have 52 posts for you this coming year (one for each week, for the mathematically challenged). In addition to that, I hope to do something big with my photography. I wont mention specifics right now, but I am currently working on a couple big projects that should come to fruition this year. There are a few more resolutions that I can think of off the top of my head, but we aren’t that close, and even then, what’s a girl without her secrets?

And now, I’ll leave you with a few late comers to the Christmas game, and a few photos from a bar last weekend. I hope you all have a wonderful new years. May you find pleasure in all things you do.

Christmas...

I write this at 12:53 am. It's Christmas. There is no Santa. There is no snow. There are no loved ones. There is no holiday cheer. So tell, is it really Christmas? No. Its just another day. I have come to the conclusion that Christmas is not December 25th. December 25th is just a day. Christmas is friends and family. Christmas is the spirit of goodwill. Christmas is… well, not readily available in China right now.

I wont lie, it has not been the best of weeks for me.

I originally intended this blog post to be about the 4 goats I saw killed on the street here. I intended to discuss the how deadened I was to sight of it. How little it bothered me to see these 4 animals stabbed in the back of the head, only to be laid upon the ground and have their throats slit. The crimson blood draining from their bodies into an awaiting basin. That’s what I intended to write about, but after a week’s worth of other events, I’ve started wondering how deadened I am in general. I just feel… indifferent.

It has been a fairly stress filled week, with little or no time to vent. I’ve been giving my students their finals, which gives me almost no time to do anything else. I have now realized I have too many students (appx. 900), which translates to too many papers to grade.

Additionally, I got some depressing news from a good friend. At first, it didn’t bother me as much as I thought it should have. It was unexpected, but at the same time a known possibility. Like a line drive with a bad bounce: you think something is going somewhere, but it suddenly changes directions. You knew it was possible, but unexpected. For some reason, though, I didn’t really react. I just watched it race right by. Days later, events piled up: loneliness sank in slightly, the weather got colder, and eventually, I must admit, I started feeling a little down, in general. It wasn’t like I was suddenly depressed or anything, but I just slowly started getting into a deeper and deeper slump. And right now, while I am sitting alone in my apartment on Christmas day knowing that in 6 hours I have to be up and teaching and giving tests… well, it makes me feel like I am sitting in a spotlight in a dark theater. I know there are other people out there, but I can’t help but feel alone.

At this point, I feel I should mention that you shouldn’t worry about me. I’m fine, and I’ll always be fine, but my blog exists for me, and I feel like writing all this.

Regardless, I know why you are really here. You want your photo. And that’s okay by me. I like giving it to you. The lead reminds me of better days, and the first few weeklies are part of that.

And Now Presenting...!

I have decided to try something new. For those of you who cant seem to get your Dan photo fix, I have decided to implement a new feature to my website: a weekly gallery! Yay! This gallery is meant to be a flavor of the week, type thing. Usually, the gallery will be of current work, but not always. Yes, it means more work for me sometimes, but it also lets me show you more images than I normally could without cluttering my blog.

From now on, the main Image will link to the gallery. Note that the main image will not always be representative of the gallery.

Keep in mind that there will be a new gallery replacing the old one every week, so no more of this checking once a month business! You snooze, you lose! In case you are not sure, the blog gets updated every Thursday. Sometimes my Thursday, and sometimes yours. Depends on my schedule, but Thursday nonetheless.

If you would like to get to the gallery without having to scroll through my (admittedly) sometimes annoying posts, feel free to cruise to it directly at http://www.dansandoval.com/weekly.

Lastly, if you like the idea, or like the images, please let me know via the comments. Even though I do this for me, its nice to know that someone, besides me, looks at it every now and again.



P.S. Lets see how long I manage to keep this gallery thing going…

It's in My Bones

I can feel it. Whenever I leave my house, it is there. Whenever I stray too far from the comforts of my desk and bed, it is there. It’s a sinking cold that seems to just crawl into the deepest warmth you have. Chengdu is nestled in mountains, and though I may have mentioned it before, one of the things it is known for is its lack of sunlight. Chengdu tends to have overcast skies throughout winter, as is the city that gets the least amount of sunlight per year. Its not that the sun is not there, but it is obstructed by the giant diffuser in the form of overcast skies. To give you an idea of how little direct light makes it to the surface here: I’ve come to notice that my students consider it sunny if they cast any type of shadow.

Being from Los Angeles, at first it was a little depressing. For the most part, though, I’ve learned to deal with it. The only thing that I have trouble getting past, though, is the lack of warmth that comes from the sun. Like I previously stated, its USUALLY not cold enough for me to feel like I’m going to freeze to death in an instance, but its more of a slow cold. It’s the type of cold that sneaks up on you, and the next thing you know, you are getting sleepy and tired as your system shuts down into a sleep you will never awaken from. Okay, so I’m being melodramatic, but it really is a cold that you don’t exactly notice at first.

Most of the time, when I go somewhere that I consider cold, I walk around for a bit, and not too much later, I’m used to the temperature difference. Here, it is the opposite: I walk outside and think to myself ‘Oh, its not too cold today. I can go out without the heavy jacket!’ But as I walk around, it slowly sinks into me. I don’t notice it for a while, usually, but then, I suddenly will realize how cold I feel. And by then, its not the kind of cold that throwing on an extra layer can get rid of. No, its the cold that can only be taken away by sitting in front of a heater for a nice long while, or taking a long hot shower, or even just curling up under some blankets and watching T.V. for a bit.

Anyway, keep that in mind when traveling to China in the winter. Oh, and here is some advice that applies to both Photoshop and cold: Layers are your best friends.

Disclaimer: No layers were involved in the making of this image.

Rat Tat Tat

One of the things people tend to overlook in China, is the huge subcultures that exist here. When we think China, we, of the western mind, are led to believe that China is a largely impoverished place where people live as poor farmers. Not true at all. What we hear of even less, is large amount of people that are a lot like us.

Last weekend, I went to a… bar, for lack of better words, where a guy I know was playing drums. What he does is play drums on stage with a DJ mixing. Its like a DJ/Drum band. Pretty cool stuff, and you have to be a pretty good drummer to be able to improvise and have enough changes so it doesn’t get repetitive. I was fairly impressed. He was honestly one of the best live drummers I’ve seen, which is not something we readily think of when we think of China. We don’t think of the skateboarders here, but skate they do. We don’t think of the rock guitarists here, but man can some of these guys play. We don’t think of the cafes, but there are some people that really love their coffee. All we really focus on is the vast number of people and the fact that the government here is communist.

Truth be told, we are often led to believe by our media that China is nothing like America, and in some ways, that is true. People don’t always have the same freedoms we do, but Ill tell you what they do have: people here wont often run into people that are highly impoverished. There isn’t the giant gap between the poor and the rich that we tend to see in the states. Most people are happy here. They don’t tend to complain about the government or their lifestyle. I don’t see many people that live on the streets here. I don’t see many people begging for money. These things that are so common in America are not as common here. So perhaps we westerners criticize the Chinese for their iron grip on the people, but the truth is, that iron grip isn’t usually that noticeable, but the results of it are.

On Their Minds

This last week there was an art exhibition at my school. I am not sure what grade level(s) the art belonged to, but it was on display in the area of the junior students (grade 7 and 8). As I casually looked at some of these works, I thought to myself that some of it was pretty decent, but the more I looked, the more involved some of this work became. A quick detour:

Some of you recall the big earthquake that happened in China earlier this year. For those of you who don’t, Ill sum it up: a 7.9 earthquake shook southwest China. It decimated towns, and killed over 60,000 people, and left hundreds of thousands missing, injured, and/or homeless. The earthquake was so strong that it was felt in Beijing and Taiwan. There are cities where over 80% of the buildings were destroyed. One of those cities happens to be near what is considered the capital of Southwest China, Chengdu. Chengdu is the city where I live. The city nearby that was demolished by the earthquake is named DuJiang.

DuJiang was one of the cities that had the highest death/injury tolls, and left the majority of structures there in ruins. Reconstruction is under way, but many of the people there are still living in temporary shelters.

Now, if your short term memory is not as bad as mine, you will recall that I began this post talking about art. Lets go back to that. As it turns out, a fair number of the students that attend my school call DuJiang home. The more I looked at some of the art, the more I realized what these children had been exposed to. Truly, this must have been a traumatizing experience for them, as is shown through their art. I cannot know the intensity of the emotions that lie beneath their skins, but I truly feel sympathy, as children should never have to live and see what some of them have lived and seen. It is a harsh reality in which we live, and children ARE exposed to such tragedy (daily in some places which are ravished by war). This week, I have decided to show you some of their art. I apologize for the bad copy art, but it was the best I could do under the circumstances. Click on the image to go to an album with more images. I’ve used flickr for this album, as it is easier to deal with when it comes to albums.

The Ups and Downs

We all occasionally feel the need for home. I think it is something innate within us all. Whether we come from some little country home, or a big city bustle, if we have gone away, we always have moments where we remember the good things of home, and wish, if only for a few minutes, that we could return to that place in our memories.

It could be that these moments happen more frequently when you first move away, and given that I've only been away for about 5 weeks now, I find it hard to speak of how I will feel in the long run, but I have definitely had a few of these moments. Sometimes I miss the sunshine, other times its a good burger, and occasionally, I even miss the traffic in L.A. (which is VERY different than Chinese traffic)

So what do I do when these moments arise? Do I pack my bags and head home? Of course not. Instead, I search for something that is related to home. On a sunny day, rare as they are, I bask in the light when I'm not teaching. Soaking in the rays of warmth as I play my guitar. Some days, I turn the television onto the English channel and let it talk away in the background. Sadly, there are times where I give in to the devil known as McDonalds, just so I can have something that is truly like home (although its not QUITE the same).

On the other hand, the longer I am away, the less I have this feeling of the NEED for the comforts of home. The more accustomed I become to the daily differences of China. Differences like the weather here (which is a big one for me), the lack of availability of non-Chinese foods, and the lack of English speaking people. Now, I realize that form some people this can be very daunting, but for me, it just sometimes sucks. So to ease the difficulties I face, I tend to fall into habit. In a way, I am creating comfort zones. I will visit the same restaurants, as I know that I like the food there, and I know that they know what I want to order. I will stay at the same hostel when I go into town, as they know me there (part of it is also that its the best hostel in town and the people that run it are the best). These little things make my life here a lot easier to deal with on a day to day basis.

One of my more usual activities in China, is going to a bar near the heart of Chengdu. The name of the bar is Lotus Palace, and it is an awesome environment. As most of you know, I don't really drink alcohol, but its not the spirits that attract me; it's the vibe. The people that go to the Lotus Palace are usually... upper middle class. The entertainment, which includes American rock, hip hop, and country covers, Chinese singing (which gets the crowd really going), belly dancers, and fire juggling behind the bar, is top notch. But most of all, its the friendliness of the people in attendance that I enjoy. People are always trying to start up conversation, and regardless of the language barrier, you end up having a great time by conversing using your hands and broken "Chinglish". All in all, I'd say the place is great, although somewhat on the pricey side. Anyway, I'm through with this post. They say a picture is worth a thousand words (although market rates beg to differ [photos are worth far less than that. I previously worked for a magazine, which pays $.25/word which yields a photo to be worth... $250 if we go in accord to the old saying. This magazine tends to pay $75.00/photo; significantly less than the value attributed by whomever made the saying up {possibly Fred R. Bernard?}. /sadface]) so I will leave you with an image from my Halloween at the Lotus Palace. Enjoy.

Twitter for Dan

Hmmm... so I've decided to make a twitter account. Ill use it a lot if I can get it to work with my Blackberry from China. If I can't, then it wont see much use, as the only reason I can really think of wanting to use it is to state something on the fly. Anyway, the address for it is http://twitter.com/dandoval. Well see how it goes.

In The Trenches

See that view? Its the view from my window as I write this. I'm in China. I have been here for a few days, but I have been to lazy to post my initial reaction to arriving here. Its very difficult to make myself do anything when I don't have the Internet in my apartment. I mean, even writing this blog post seems semi futile, as who knows when it will actually get posted. But at least you know it has been written. At least I know it has been written. Losing productivity is not what I want to happen here. I have to keep myself busy.

Well, after being here a few days, I have come to discover what is hardest about being here: I have no one to talk to most the time. I feel as if I have taken a vow of silence at times. I find myself trying to have conversations with cab drivers that don't understand what I am saying. I find myself trying to start conversations with every foreigner I see. I know, I have only been here 4 days, and last time I was here for 5 weeks, but this time, I am alone. I have no companions to speak with. Also, I am not as central in the city, which means that there are fewer English speaking Chinese here, and less foreigners. I am pretty sure that the hardest part of this is the transition, but it does get pretty bad. Right now, music is my biggest friend.

I think once I get the internet in my room, things will become much easier. Oh, on a side note, I fried my 360 power supply when I plugged it in, as I stupidly forgot that they use 220v of power as opposed to our 110v in the states.

Check In

Well, this is my final blog post from the U.S. for a while. My plane leaves tonight at 145 am. I may not have an immediate update to my blog, as I don't know how long it will take me to set up my interweb there. I must admit,  I am anxious and excited about leaving. I am saddened to leave some of my closest friends behind. People I have known for over 10 years, and some I have known for less, but are, by no means any lesser friends. I am leaving my family behind, which I know I will feel the most around the holidays. I hope to hear from all of you. I hope that when I return, we find each other again.

Morning

(this is part of the Eastern Sierras series of images)

We camped at Tom's Place. Well, not exactly, but near it. Tom's Place is just North of Bishop along the 395. You can find it on a map fairly easily. The name of the campsite, was Aspen Grove. That place is beautiful. As we were driving there, we were making plans relating to waking up before sunrise in hopes to get me to a place where I could shoot sunrise. When we arrived at the campsite at midnight, we began to doubt that it was going to happen. When we went to bed at 3am, we knew it wasn't going to happen. Instead, we made plans to get up at 7. As we dozed off, the night got colder and colder, until the point in which I decided to bury myself in a sleeping bag like a caterpillar in a cocoon. Even the best plans fail. Luckily, we only slept in until 8am.

Soon after we got up, the sun started creeping over the nearby mountains and shining light into our campsite. Just as the sun peeked over the peaks, our campsite lit up with the glow of a million glowing aspen leaves. Its funny how warm direct light from the sun can be. As we began packing our tent, and boiling water, I picked up my camera and began shooting. Its hard to describe in a photo the beauty of that glow.  The feeling of warmth as the first rays of sun light hit you on a cold morning. Its as if the whole world woke up with the sun.

The Eastern Sierras

As promised, here is the first of a few photos that I recently took in the Eastern Sierra Nevada Mountains while camping with a my friend Nick. (see http://www.nickspeaks.com).

It started late, as it always does. Leaving 2 hours later than we originally thought we'd leave, we got on the 405 freeway and headed north. The ever present L.A. traffic carried us along to the 5 freeway, where traffic let up a bit, and we eventually met the 14. Leaving later, meant arriving later. Arriving later, meant changing plans.

As we cruised up the 14, and consecutively the 395, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of nostalgia as I saw somewhat familiar places. I couldn't help but remember silly memories. Memories of a friend sticking his head out a window while I was driving 80, just so he could feel the air. Stupid? Yes, but very memorable. I couldn't help but remember seeing signs for alien beef jerky out in the middle of nowhere. I remember a gas station that no longer exists. Silly memories. I also couldn't help but think that this will be the last trip I take with one of my best friends for a while.

As we reached the town of Lone Pine, plan changes began. Instead of catching sunset in the white mountains, we went to the Alabama Hills. We entered the Alabama Hills via movie road (look it up). As we pulled up, sunset began. I began to prepare my camera gear to shoot sunset, when I realized I forgot my primary CF card. Bravo. Luckily, I carry spares. Unluckily, I discovered that these spares were un-formatable, according to my camera. This led to me carrying a 20 pound camera bag for half a mile for no reason. After some slightly adventurous (read: stupid) climbing on my part, we meandered back to the car as sunset truly became dusk. When we got to the car, Nick attempted to fix my cards, but in the end, removing the batteries from my camera and trying to format again fixed it. According to Nick, "its just another computer" and a restart fixes all (unless you run windows...witch I do).

Having fixed my cards, we headed back towards the rocks we explored earlier. As we walked out, dusk became night, and we soon found ourselves depending on our flashlights on that moonless night. After a slight mix up, we arrived back at our pre-explored rock. At this point, it was too dark for any decent landscapes, so I decided to shoot some pseudo-portraits of Nick. This is one of those. The others look a lot like it.

Afterwards, we headed back towards the car, and after getting a little turned around, we gave thanks to the men who invented glossy paint and car reflectors (picture flashlights scanning the dark, and a lot of "I don't remember there being a path here"). We headed back down Movie Road, to Whitney Portal Road, to the 395 on which we continued through the night. As I drove, I knew that I had just created another one of those silly memories.

The End is Near!

2 step process: Watch the video. Register to vote.

A Lesson in Finances

Here is a good way to help explain what's going on with the economy, with a little help from the folks in Duckberg:

Prelude

Well, it seems the paperwork for my Chinese visa is in the works. I should have my visa by Monday. The closer it gets, the less real it seems. Regardless, I feel this trip will serve to better myself. It seems I have at least one more journey to embark upon (I am really hoping for 2, but I have to convince someone to go with me on the second) while here in the U.S. I will be going to the Eastern Sierras this weekend with one of my best friends (see http://www.nickspeaks.com). This means that soon this will once again become a photo blog, and you will not have to deal with my incessant rants any longer; at least not for a couple of weeks.

I will attempt to be thorough with my new blog format, though. I will attempt to describe the photos and tell more about the image than I have in the past, as I am striving for a mixed medium format in the hopes of becoming a better writer and advancing my career. I hope that this will also serve as a bridge with those friends I leave behind while in China. That way, they know what I have done, and will hopefully respond to my tales. So far, I am actually quite happy that I have been able to maintain my weekly updates. I also hope, for the few who do subscribe to the RSS feed, that I have not become too much of an annoyance. Anyway, stay tuned.

Outstanding

I would hate to belittle my Wicked post, as I still think everyone who reads this should go watch that musical, but I just found an article I thought I'd share. Some of my friends have lately been wondering what they want out of life. The question "What am I doing with my life?" has come up amongst more than a few of my cohorts, and so, as I was reading this article, I thought of them. I haven't read it all yet, so I cannot vouch for the article fully, but from what I have read so far, there are some of you who may find this useful. Anyway, hope it helps:

http://thinksimplenow.com/motivation/how-to-be-outstanding/

P.S. Go watch Wicked!

A Wicked Good Time

Ever have one of those days when something really cool happens, and you cant help but replay the event over and over in your head? Well, if you haven't, I highly recommend going to watch the musical "Wicked", so you can experience the feeling for yourself. Long after you leave the 3 hour show, you will be singing the songs in your head over and over, and even when the lyrics fade, the tunes will linger on.

I went to watch the show Wednesday night at the Pantages Theatre here in LA. I know we have all heard how good it is, but musicals are expensive, so we tend to shy away from them. Sometimes, we may feel that we need a friend to recommend something before we go throw down so much money. This is my recommendation.When you go watch Wicked, you will feel it was money VERY well spent. I, personally, want to watch it again.

As a former theatre director, I have truly learned to appreciate how technical musicals can be, and I must say, the sets and lighting in Wicked blew me away. Wicked is one of those shows that has something for everyone. Its got comedy, romance, action and (of course) drama. The acting was great, and the singing fantastic. Some of the choreography I felt was just okay, but most was very well done. Wicked is one of those shows that makes me wonder why I don't normally go watch more live theatre.

To sum it up, go watch Wicked. You wont regret it, and you'll thank me later.

In the Dead of Night

As some of you know (or most of you, as the case would have it) I tend to not sleep much. I have a weird sleeping schedule, which usually lands me about 4-6 hours of sleep, although admittedly, its been closer to 6 lately. I have no issue with my sleep schedule, and I normally feel very rested. Lately though, I've decided to try something different.

As of the writing of this post, I have not slept in approximately 66 hours. The worst part is, as odd as it sounds, I'm not particularly sleepy. I realize that after I get some rest, I very well wake up and find that I have written a few paragraphs of incoherent gibberish, but right now, I feel fine. So here is what happened:

The game Spore was released on Sunday. (Amazing game, by the way. If you are at all questioning wether to buy it or not, do so.) I played the game for a while, went to bed. Monday, I woke up, did some stuff, and eventually ended up playing World of Warcraft (WoW) that evening. At about 3:30 - 4 am, I quit WoW and decided to play Spore for what I thought would be an hour or so. I play Spore, and eventually decided to look at the clock. I knew I had certainly gone over an hour, but lo and behold, it was noon, on the dot. After I cursed myself for being an idiot, I decided that it would REALLY screw up my sleep schedule if I went to sleep at that point, so instead of sleep, I read. After reading, I started getting sleepy, so I showered, then ate. By the time the night had rolled around again, I was no longer sleepy at all. Sure, I felt a little tired, but not sleepy. So I thought to myself, "I wonder how hard it would be to do it again." Well, it had been a while since I tested my limits on sleep depravation, so I thought "What the hell" and decided to find out how hard it would be, and how long I could go. The next night had a similar schedule to the first. I must admit, the hardest parts usually come between 2am and 6am. This is when the world is quietest, I find. People on the west coast have gone to bed, and people on the east are not quite awake yet. It is these times where staring at a screen becomes the hardest.

This is my third night doing this, and will probably be the last, as it is becoming increasingly difficult to ward off the Sandman.

I would like to describe some of the oddities I have experienced due to the lack of sleep:

It starts with the sole feeling of lacking energy. When I first got tired, I wanted to do nothing but lie there, which would lead to sleep. This was easy to overcome. From then on, this feeling would come in waves. It was easy to get through these waves, so long as I kept myself busy.

Day 2 had my eyes occasionally becoming very watery, which would be followed by a burning sensation in the eyes, especially when exposed to bright light (I believe that this feeling is to be expected). This would occasionally reoccur, although less frequently, during the following day.

Sometime around night 2, I would find myself staring into space. I was not asleep, but I was definitely going through phases of just clearing my mind and thinking of nothing. I would realize, for example, that I had been staring at a computer screen for no reason for a couple minutes while doing nothing, or that I suddenly had stopped reading my book. I wasn't quite sleepy, but once again, I was not at 100%.

Sometime during day 3, I began to get an occasional headache. It would be a sharp pang of pain in the area behind the eyes, which would quickly reside. I have not had one of these since after dinner, though, so it is possible that they were hunger related, although doubtful.

At some point here, it became impossible for me to go outside without sunglasses. It just made my eyes water.

During the evening of day 3, I am guessing it happened around 5pm, I started experiencing a variety of optical illusions. I would imagine that I saw slight movement here or there, or things would start wavering. I thought I saw a vase with flowers tipping over, but as I my body instinctively jerked to prepare to catch it, I realized it hadn't moved. Lastly, and perhaps most curiously, as it occurred with most frequency, was the fact that my brain began making errors with colors.  My red LCD alarm clock numbers glowed a darker cyan at one point for a period of about 10 seconds, only for it to go back to its normal color after a blink. A dark red car (maybe burgundy) looked violet to me for a few seconds. There are a few other colors that changed in hue (got brighter/darker), and a couple other colors that were swapped (green and orange), but mostly, the swap came with shades of red and blue. Very strange, but I don't have the awareness to do a proper net search at the moment to see if anything has been documented in regards to it.

Right now, I once again feel tired, but not quite sleepy. It is currently 635 am. I began writing this at 6. I am tempted to stay up for another 5.5 hours in order to make it an even 72, but I feel it would almost be torture. I have the energy left to do it. It would only take a coke and a quick bite to eat in order for me to be re-energized enough to do this another day, but my body is not the problem. My real problem, lies more in my mental condition. I know I am not all here right now. If only you cold see all the typos I am currently making. My body is tired, but I am not really exhausted. My mind, on the other hand, yearns for a break. It is very difficult to maintain a thread of thought. Reading has become difficult, as I have trouble processing what I am reading. I read it, only to find that I did not understand what it is I have read. Even gaming is difficult, as I find myself suddenly blanking out. Even writing this is difficult, as I start to write something, only to forget the point I was making. I was attempting to do simple mathematics earlier (adding up the hours I've been awake) and even that was horribly slow going. I actually had to think about something as simple as 24x2+12+6. It took me 2-3 minutes to do what you've probably done at a glance. I must say, though, I consider this a worthy experiment. It has shown me that if I needed to, I can easily (for the most part) stay awake, but, in those situations, I should avoid making critical decisions, and should instead attempt to solve problems in the simplest of fashions.

It is now 6:55am on day 3, and I have not slept in 67 hours. This blog post will remain unedited after posting, regardless of how incoherent it may seem to me in retrospect. I have not even gone back to read what I wrote. Truly, though, I just wanted to state all of what I have experienced as an initial reaction, before everything has processed. Maybe I will write a blog post in response to this, although I really find it doubtful that I will. Who knows. As the age old saying states: Let me sleep on it.

My Issues with the Law

Welcome to corporate America. A land where the people have rights and privileges beyond anywhere else in the free world, so long as the corporations allow it. A place where a consumer must take responsibility for the actions of corporations. A place where we live by corporate law.

I know, it may sound melodramatic, but alas, this is what America, the land of rebels and freedom, has become. We live as sheep, being herded by corporations to our respective pens. What has brought this onset of thought? Well, let me tell you a story:

A month ago, I purchased a laptop from Dell. The very laptop I am using to write this post. When I purchased the laptop, the sales rep specifically told me that I would have 21 days in which to test the machine and make sure that it was up to par. 21 days from the point where I received it, to ensure that it would work for what I needed. Guess what? She lied. As it turns out, Dell has a policy that states that you have 21 days to return your machine FROM THE POINT OF INVOICE, not from when you receive it. That, my friends, is one full week less that I was told. And so, when I decided today that this machine, though quite nice, was not up to par, I called Dell. At this point, I was, pretty much told, that I had been lied to, and, because I was one day over the 21 days from point of invoice, there was nothing I could do about it. This, obviously, angered me. Now, being passive aggressive, I decided to punch a wall, and ask to speak with a supervisor in a calm voice. Let it go on record, that I never raised my voice to the operator.

The response I got from her was a simple "No." I asked why not, and was told by her that because there was nothing that he could do about it either. I told her that that regardless, I would like to speak with her supervisor, and was repeatedly denied. I asked her if I could call back later and speak with a supervisor, and she told me that I shouldn't, and that she didn't want me to. I asked for her name and rep number, and decided that I didn't want to deal with her anymore, and hung up.

So let me pose this question to you, dear reader: What can we do in a situation like this? What can we, as consumers and citizens in a virtual world, do to ensure we maintain our rights? If a representative for a company tells us one thing, should that company not stand by their representative and validate their words? What ever happened to "The Customer is Always Right"? Well, Dell, although I do like this laptop, your customer service has made it so that I am hesitant to ever purchase from you again. Your sales reps have ensured that I will never trust you again. And your corporate inability to right a wrong has made me lose faith. Is this what we are to expect from corporations? I hope not, but the more of these stories I read about, the more obvious it has become to me that this is the trend towards which we are headed. We are but ants in a world of giants, and I am sick of seeing people stepped on. Only together can we make a difference.

Delays

Well, my trip to China seems to have been delayed. Because of the Earthquake in the Sichuan province, the teaching semester got pushed back by 2 weeks, which means that they don't start the new semester until 2 weeks later. Additionally, China has some sort of national holiday which is 1 week long, and thus, I start teaching 3 weeks later than originally intended. C'est la vie.

I'm Officially a Pro

Well, its official. I am a professional travel photographer (and writer). The San Joaquin Magazine has decided that I am awesome, and because of that they decided to give me a story. It's a small travel piece on Santa Monica. Check it out, and if you really like me, write a letter to the editor letting them know how much you liked the photos and the writing for the story. Ill make it easy for you to do: Send your praise to tony@insidemagazines.com. Support the arts (by supporting me!). One love, rasta.

http://www.sanjoaquinmagazine.com/sanjoaquin/08_2008/santa_monica.html

Hollywood Subway, Los Angeles, CA

At the Hollywood subway station in Los Angeles, CA.

The Days of Old

Remember the olden days when blogs were hip and people updated fairly often? I feel that fad has come and gone. People no longer care about publishing their lives (with the exception of a few), and people no longer care to read about the day to day events of a friend's life. So we maintain a feigned interest by checking up on others every once a month, or even once every couple months. Sadly, though, I feel that this has allowed us (yes, I'm talking about yourself and myself, dear reader) to become more distant than I would like. So in that light I am extending a friendly hand in the form of more posts. Whether they be writing or photos, I will try to update this blog more often. Maybe all I do is write a blurb, but I will try to make this a weekly format. When during that week? Well, I make no promises in that regard. So now, I bet you're wondering what I get out of it? I just want to know you are still there. Thanks for reading.

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Hollywood Subway Station, at Hollywood and Highland.

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Same location as previous, but facing south instead of east.

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From the roof of a private living complex. Downtown, Los Angeles. Near 6th Street exit off the 110 Freeway.

/sigh

That's a sigh of relief.

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Union Station, Downtown, Los Angeles. Tunnel text and caution signs edited in Photoshop.

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Parking lot in Downtown, Los Angeles. Near the Superior Court.

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On the stairs of the Walt Disney Concert Hall. Downtown, Los Angeles.

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In a tunnel. Downtown, Los Angeles. Enjoy.

Staying Downtown

Another of the shots that Ive been working on. This building is also located in downtown Los Angeles. Enjoy.

Downtown

So Ive been out shooting a fair amount these last couple weeks and I thought I'd share. Ive been experimenting with a couple new techniques using what is know as HDR (High Dynamic Range) and applying a high pass filter to these images. I've gotten some really interesting results, which I'll share with you over the course of the next couple weeks. Here is the first:

Bringing up the Past

This is one of my favorite toy photos. I shot this a long time ago, back while studying at Santa Monica College. Reminds me of easier days. Her name, if I remember correctly, is Wanda. Anyways, enjoy.

Time

Seems no one has time to post anything on their blogs any more. No updates no news, not even a couple minutes a month to let us know they are still alive. Well, my faithful readers, I have not forgotten you. I may be bad about posting, but I at least try to do the once a month thing. Hope you're still with me.Ill hopefully have another update soon.

Kaboom

Another high speed photo; mafia style.

Done Moving, Organizing

Enough time to post, too lazy to write.